Rules I Never Thought I'd Need

No dancing with the cat.
No licking your brother's feet.
One person on the potty at a time.
You are not allowed to stand on me.
No dressing the cat.
No helping the cat on his mission to enter the aquarium, no matter how badly he wants it.
Eat only your own food.
Keep your hotwheels out of your lemonade.
No eating while crawling on the table.
You're only allowed to talk about penises at home.
Meow is not an answer.
Only hit people with swords if they are also holding a sword.
I appreciate your attempts at decorating, but stickers only go on paper.