memorandum

To my Dearest Husband, While I appreciate the great faith you have in our children, first grade is entirely too young to be in charge of one's own homework and folder. Saying, "Sit down and do your homework, Dixie" then going into another room and never checking back is simply unacceptable, especially when the child is often in the backyard as you say this. Homework done in the backyard is rarely done well. Also at issue is a matter of spelling homework. Spelling homework is not designed to be done independently. One cannot give one's self a practice spelling test. The logistics simply do not work out. Also, the parent page at the back of the folder is to be initialed by the parent, not forged by the seven-year-old in question. Although you may not recognize the difference between my handwriting and hers, that she was penciling in her own smiley faces instead of having them rubber stamped by the teacher should have been a clue. Yet another clue that things were amiss might be that her folder was filled entirely with drawing paper, half of it blank. I realize that having children in school is a new concept, as we've only had school 5 days a week, 36 weeks a year for the past two years and that we all know she can be completely entrusted with all other tasks required of her, except, of course, those complicated ones like remembering to wipe her own butt. Still, please know that she requires more guidance in this area.  In the future, when I come home from work each day and ask, "Have the girls done their homework?" please do not answer, "Yes!" unless you have made visual confirmation of that.  Thank you for your attention to this matter, Your Loving Wife