I sleep with a small piece of velcro in my bed

I swear it is not there when I get in at night. But inevitably, at some point, I awaken and there it is. Clinging to me. I am never sure where it will pop up--at my head, my feet, between my knees, under my back. It wraps it's little talon-like things around me, digs in and attaches. Every time I move, it comes even closer. Many nights I can hardly sleep because I wake up every time it moves between my body and that of my husbands. Some nights it brings a sister velcro along.

Each night, before bed, I swear I read it a story, give it a hug and kiss and tuck it into its own bed. This doesn't seem to matter, though, as it is not content to stay there. Some invisible noise or silent vision startles it awake, signaling mommy-seeking behavior. Yet it hunts me down.

It would not be so bad were it content to just stay close to me. But every time I wiggle, it wriggles in closer and if I get on my knees and hands a bit to try to change positions or move to a different spots, the suction power of its tentacles pulls it underneath me and then I really am stuck with no place to sleep. Especially on nights when the velcro, her sister, myself, my husband and a variety of household pets are all sharing the same full-sized bed. I am just glad that the smallest piece cannot yet climb out of its crib or open the door.

And now that winter-ish weather has presented itself, those little clingers are COLD and shock me awake with their warmth-seeking behavior.

So I retreat. I retreat to the couch before I am found. One time, I even went to the guest room/dump and cleared a spot. I have briefly considered discovering if I can sleep in a Velcro-sized bed because I am confident that that would be the one place it didn't try to find me.


Leah said...

Somehow I've managed to escape velco ever finding it's way into MY bed, and it sounds like I should be thanking my lucky stars! LOL

I LOVE your blog, you are such a great story-teller. I never would have thought of my children as velcro, but WOW, it certainly does describe their random clingy behaviors (daytime behaviors in our case) to a "T"!!!

Anonymous said...

It really is a guest room/dump. I think a lot of this is funnier to me because I know how true most of it is.


~Gretchen~ said...

Thanks for the vote of confidence there, Uncle Trey.

Rebecca said...

My little piece of velcro is still baby-gated in her room at night. She has learned though, if she yells for daddy (not mommy, no chance of this ever working with mommy) and uses her sweet as pie voice to say "I want to sleep in YOU bed"...that daddy will carry her to the big bed, dump her on mommy, and go back to sleep.

It's deal that everyone is happy with....except mommy.

Anonymous said...

We have three pieces of velcro. Two walk on four legs, have disgusting hygene habits, and communicate with barks. However, they can be removed if need be.

The third one, well, that is a little trickier. Even when we put her in her own velcro pouch, she finds her way back to ours by morning.

I tell myself to enjoy it as they are only little for so long (and mine is already wearing 3T + on her two and a half year old frame).

Keep the blogs coming, they help make the day! :-)